I was browsing through some old blog entries and found a quote I'd posted. It's one of my favorites on a t-shirt hanging in the dojo I take kickboxing in:
"A black belt is a white belt who didn't quit!"
It's simplistic, I know. But it's true.
When I am down, down, down, discouraged, depressed, I feel like the kid who wants to take his ball and go home. I feel this way a lot. As a matter of fact, I feel that way often in kickboxing class. There are so many things I don't do well, or can't even do at all.
But if I stay with that horrible feeling and think it through, I always--ALWAYS--come back to that silly statement:
"A black belt is a white belt who wouldn't quit."
If you quit, that's it. You have NO CHANCE of succeeding. Game over.
If you don't give up, you have a CHANCE at succeeding, no matter how small. With kickboxing, I still cannot picture myself passing the black belt exam. But if I keep trying, maybe I can inch a little bit closer each class. (It feels like Zeno's paradox, but that's still better than quitting....)
It will be the same with my artwork. If I give up, it will go nowhere. If I keep at it, SOMETHING is possible.
I'm not sure I always have the right information on HOW to succeed as an artist, and I'll be the first to admit that.
But if you walk away, I know for sure it will never happen.
That's the conclusion I came to Tuesday morning this week. It felt like the first time nine years ago when I first set my heart at "making it" as an artist. I said to my husband, "I have to do it. I have to be an artist. I don't even care if I'm a GOOD artist anymore--I just have to do it."
And that's my thought today.... I STILL don't care if I'm a good artist or not. (Okay, I DO care.) But I have to keep trying. Because not trying anymore feels much, much worse than trying and failing.
The new small series is working out well! I came up with really cool little "shaman" masks that fit beautifully. Maybe I can get some images of them up one of these days....
P.S. I just reread the last few days' posts. Goodness, I've been down! I should preface my remarks by saying, I AM enjoying success with my biz, just feeling like I should be moving faster.
